Six Months to Somewhere?

So, it's been six months has it?
Something like that - feels like years, or days whichever way it falls in my head.

What have I achieved?

I'd say the single most interesting aspect of this move is my chill quotient, which has reached new heights of childomity I never thought possible.

I always knew I was a soft soul at heart, relaxed and slightly hippyfied, now I realise that it's true - I am. Joburg had really bought the worst out in myself due to the horrible stress of living in mild fear for so much of my time there.

For the second time, the spagetti in my pot fell out when I was draining it, into the sink. For the second time I calmly decided to cook another pot without any anger at all. Six months back, I would've been cursing like a mad thing. That means something, it means I'm just simply more at ease. Those little things are what count. Anger? - heck, yeah, I get angry, but the wild boiling anger has gone to be replaced with a more logical, less stressed version.

I'm still no closer to figuring out why I exist, but then, that's something that not many people ever do quite get to grips with. Greater minds than mine have grappled with the unanswerable question - why?

Pay it no mind, that's the general idea.

These days I figure my existence is merely to learn and experience whatever is thrown my way and also to just be overawed at everything around.

Often I feel insignificant when I view the great achievements that others have made compared to my meager offerings, but it doesn't get me down. Keep striving on and generally enjoy life as much as possible. If your not happy with something, try to change it.

Easy words to say, in the up and down world of mood swings, bad days, good days and humdrum living.

What always freaks me out is how such small things can derive such sheer pleasure. How on earth could looking over green fields populated by sheep and birds stir the heart to such a large degree?

Who knows.

I'm really nowhere, but that's ok - I'm alive, summer is on its way and there's things to learn, to see, to experience - is there really anything else needed?

Hmmm, no.